Alcoholics Anonymous History
Dick B.’s Story
“Rarely have we seen a
person fail who has thoroughly followed our path."
(Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th
ed., 26)
Dick B.’s Story
(May 1, 2012)
I was born in Stockton,
California, in 1925. I was the only child of two loving parents. My dad was a
successful securities salesman. My mother was a concert pianist and studied the
Bible every day. My dad had quit smoking before I was born, and neither parent
gave evidence of any problem with alcohol. I saw no reason to smoke, and I
didn’t. I saw no reason to drink, and I did not drink until I returned from the
Army at age 21.
In school, I excelled. Top of my class in high school and
valedictorian at my graduation. At the University of California in Berkeley, I
was elected to Phi Beta Kappa in my Junior Year and was president of the Inter
Fraternity Scholastic Honor Society. Before going to Stanford, I received an
A.A. degree in Economics with Honorable Mention. At Stanford University, I was
elected to the board of Stanford Law Review, on the basis of grades, and became
Case Editor of the Stanford Law Review in my second year on the board. There
received B.A. in Law and a Doctor of Jurisprudence degree
I married a
Stanford girl, and we had two sons. Neither she nor the sons were or became
alcoholics. And, after a successful ten-year career as an attorney in a San
Francisco law firm, I opened my own law office in Corte Madera, California. I
had suffered from sleeping problems in law school and ever since. A psychiatrist
had been the first of many physicians who enabled me, step by step, to become
dependent upon and to abuse high-powered sedatives and such mind-altering
palliatives as valium, thorazine, and quide. Worse, I began mixing them with
drinks during the night; and soon I was passing out on the kitchen floor each
morning with an almost unbearable body discomfort I called the “heeby
jeebies”—not a shaking without, but certainly an unbelievable trembling within.
None of this had the slightest impact in deterring my continued excessive
drinking.
As success in my law practice increased, the time spent practicing
law decreased. But not before I had been very active in business, community,
service, and religious affairs. I held an elected office; became president of a
Merchant Council and Chamber of Commerce; was Secretary and Vice President of a
service club, and became president of a community church and of its retirement
center. The money poured in. Ten years later, the story was very different. My
drinking had accelerated to the point that I was daily in an almost-drunken
state by day’s end. I drank at service club meetings, at chamber of commerce
functions, at church meetings, at social events, at the business quarters of a
regular drinking buddy next door to my office, and finally alone at home in the
evenings. My wife wouldn’t even leave the kitchen to join me despite appeals for
her company. If someone had told me I had a problem with alcohol and
prescription drugs—and they did—my response was that the problem was my wife, my
sleep disorders, and occasionally the number of “minor” auto accidents which
occurred when I drank “just a little too much.” Friends, colleagues, physicians,
my minister, and other erring commentators—including even some bartenders—began
to tell me and others that I was drinking too much. But that did not deter me at
all. I had reached the point where I didn’t care what they thought.
I quit
drinking for almost two years, however, when my doctor suggested I go on the
Pritikin Diet to lose a considerable amount of weight and also to eliminate
liquor “for a while.” In this endeavor, I also excelled, losing some 80 pounds,
swimming daily, drinking soda water, and following the Pritikin formula. Then I
left my wife—cold turkey. The kids had graduated from college and made new
lives, and the joy in my marriage had long since left. Or so I thought.
Armed
with this new-found fighting trim, I must have believed that I deserved to renew
drinking. But alcohol and drugs had taken a toll I did not recognize. They had
removed inhibitions and restraints that had previously been solid moral
standards in my life. I began engaging in unethical and irresponsible behavior
with a “let them eat cake” attitude. And then I got “caught.” A resentful
relative of a client called the newspapers and the State Bar. My name appeared
repeatedly in the news, along with my picture. I became severely depressed; my
clients vanished; and I drank with a vengeance I hadn’t imagined possible.
Nothing changed. In fact, everything seemed to get increasingly worse and
unbearable—the depression, the drinking, the sleeping pills, the troubles, and
the terror. Finally, I consulted a psychiatrist who recommended different
sleeping pills and anti-depressants. But I couldn’t wait. I went home, poured a
four-ounce glass of cheap gin, and went into an entire week’s blackout—a period
I can’t recall or describe even these 26 years later. And that incident, plus a
return to the psychiatrist, and the suggestion of my ex-wife, brought me to the
rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous two days sober and ready to conquer the world
without booze. But nobody in A.A. had told me about detoxing, seizures,
brain-damaged thinking, and bodily withdrawal misery. Nor was there any idea of
the financial and legal wreckage I had created.
What did happen was a series
of events that has left me with a continuing appreciation of the unique value of
Alcoholics Anonymous to new and still-suffering alcoholics. At early meetings, I
had feared the opinions of those who had seen my picture in the newspapers, who
might discover some of the things I had done, and who were not as crazy as I was
becoming. But those items were definitely unimportant to the mass of drunks I
met. At every meeting I attended, I was hugged, welcomed, given phone numbers to
call, invited to join other alcoholics after the meetings, given meeting
schedules for later meetings, told to “stick with the winners” and “keep coming
back” because “it works.” I used the phone numbers repeatedly, followed other
recovered alcoholics around, and went to meetings without ceasing. I began to
participate in A.A. service where given the opportunity. What these things did
for me inspired me to go and do likewise. And I still do. I never see a newcomer
at a meeting or a conference or even in a personal encounter without a focus on
that person’s story and needs and a possible opportunity to help.
Within a
mere nine days of attaining sobriety, however, things changed. I had three
grand-mal seizures, the first at an A.A. meeting, the second in the ambulance on
the way to the hospital, and the third in the Emergency Room. And these, in
turn, took me to a 28-day treatment program—in all cases, with no significant
mention of the importance of turning to God for help. Hence I didn’t. I put
abstinence and A.A. first—just as my fellowship contactst seemed to be
urging.
In no time at all, I faced the wreckage of the past—sober, but stuck
as well with a relentless District Attorney, State Bar investigations, a series
of ponderous tax audits and levies, divorce outcroppings, loss of my Law
License, lack of means of support other than that remaining from my own earlier
investments, and a terror and depression and despair that far exceeded that in
my drinking period. Without the “supportive” help of booze or sleeping pills, I
went sleepless for months and months. I felt like a zombie. I shook for five
years. They called me “Shaky Dick.” And my mind was seemingly only a shadow of
its former self—producing mostly forgetfulness, confusion, bewilderment,
incessant and irrelevant chatter, and tangential talk patterns. Added to that
was the unpleasant fact that I was wetting my pants regularly in A.A.
meetings.
By the end of the second month of my sobriety—the period just after
I was discharged from the treatment program—I couldn’t handle any of these
problems any more; so I checked into a VA psychiatric ward in San Francisco and
there remained for two months. I wasn’t as looney as some of the patients, but I
was twice as jittery, anxious, and talkative as most of them. I was diagnosed as
having some form of “hypomania.” I now believe it was “fear” mania!
But I had
definitely caught the A.A. bug. I didn’t drink. I didn’t take sleeping pills. I
suffered miserably from fear and insomnia. I went to A.A. meetings devotedly,
called my sponsor regularly, and followed the crowd. Very importantly, I was
made to feel wanted. I sought A.A. companionship in meetings and retreats and
conferences and studies. I chased newcomers and tried to help them—even dragging
alcoholics from the VA psych ward with me to A.A. meetings all over the San
Francisco Area. But terror and despair still plagued me at every turn.
I
faced prison, financial ruin, a lost reputation, unbearable physical
consequences of delayed withdrawal, incredible mental incapacity, insomnia,
depression, uncontrolled anxiety, loneliness, and a seemingly-hopeless state of
fear. I briefly wanted to take my life—in sobriety! Neither abstinence nor A.A.
nor the psych ward was cutting it for me.
But two factors dramatically
changed both the circumstances and my entire life at about eight months of
sobriety. These came into play while I was in the psychiatric ward in San
Francisco. One of my sons kept insisting that I needed to study the Bible and
get back into what I had learned about the availability of help from my Heavenly
Father and the accomplishments of His son Jesus Christ. That son sent me
biblical tapes to which I began listening. And then, almost every day, an
elderly friend from our Bible fellowship kept calling me long distance and
listening to me wail. Finally, he asked why I didn’t stop trying to program my
life and instead let God guide it. He cited the story of Peter’s walking on the
water. When Peter believed, said this man, he walked. When he became afraid, he
sank. And it took Jesus to pull him out of the water. I quickly saw that I had a
choice—to learn and believe what God had to offer, or to yield my thinking to
the seeming disasters the world was offering. To seek what God had to offer and
travel where He sent me. I chose God’s help and healing. I believed. Peace came.
And without a doubt, I can say that my almost-instantaneous response to these
events was to believe that, no matter what might lie ahead, God had the answers
to life; and that I had better seek Him first.
On weekend passes from the
psych ward, I began attending my elderly friend’s Bible fellowship. I stuck with
A.A., and I stuck with the Bible fellowship also. And I got well. Quickly!
Nurses noticed it. Family members noticed it. And even my attorney announced
that I was ready to bite the bullet—facing whatever the courts, the State Bar,
and the newspapers had to throw at me.
The result? I was buttressed with
solid sobriety, the A.A. program, and the Word of God. More important, with the
help of my Heavenly Father. I had a Big Book and a Bible. And my sponsor
jokingly observed: Dick is armed, but not dangerous. The fear vanished. I faced
and dealt with court hearings, imprisonment, financial problems, divorce
problems, tax problems, and reputation problems. I was released from the VA
hospital and began A.A. life in earnest. I studied and learned A.A.’s Big Book.
I studied, practiced, “took,” and learned how to take others through, the Twelve
Steps. I sponsored newcomers. I served the Fellowship as a speaker, chairperson,
secretary, treasurer, General Service Representative, greeter, chair carrier,
and floor sweeper. I went to A.A. meetings, gatherings, retreats, conferences,
birthday parties, dances, and campouts.
It was then time—long overdue-- to
grow in my relationship with, understanding of, and fellowship with my Heavenly
Father, and to change my emphasis to serving and glorifying Him. But I hadn’t
fully grasped the fact.
Nonetheless, I began bringing newcomers to Christ,
and into our Bible fellowship, while not in any way diminishing their
participation in and service to Alcoholics Anonymous. Today some of these
newcomers are more than 24 years sober, are married, have a family and a job,
and are blessed with strong believing. I thanked God daily for what He had done
for me. I asked God daily for His directions as to how to serve Him. I studied
the Bible daily and read Bible-based literature daily. I prayed to God daily for
myself and others. I affirmed the clear evidence that God could and would and
did rescue me.
I began fellowshipping with like-minded believers—many of whom
had been completely cured of alcoholism and addiction without even having heard
of Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous. But I stuck to them, and to
A.A., and to helping others in A.A. I still do.
I had done all things without
any knowledge of the fact that my behavior much resembled the behavior of the
pioneers in A.A. and of those in numerous movements that came into existence
before A.A. And what had my “predecessors” done?
Here is how I found out. I
had been sober and very active in A.A. for about four years. One night, a young
man named John—now dead of alcoholism—walked up to me in a Step Study meeting in
San Rafael, California, and asked if I knew that A.A. had come from the Bible.
John was in the Bible fellowship I was involved with and knew of my interest in
Scripture. I responded that I had been to hundreds and hundreds of meetings;
that I had been to many conferences; but that I had never heard such a thing.
John suggested that I read the A.A. General Service Conference-approved book,
DR. BOB and the Good Oldtimers (New York, NY: Alcoholics Anonymous World
Services, Inc., 1980). John said it would provide details about the biblical
roots of our A.A. Fellowship. He pointed out that the Book of James had been so
popular in early A.A. that members had wanted to call their Society, “the James
Club.” I jumped at the suggestion and began reading as much A.A. historical
material as I could find. There certainly was actually relatively little to
find. Yet, sure enough, the Bible was mentioned frequently. Also the James Club
account. Also Dr. Bob’s statements that the basic ideas of A.A. had come from
the pioneers’ study of the Bible; that the old-timers believed the answers to
their problems were in the Bible; and that the Book of James, Jesus’ Sermon on
the Mount, and 1 Corinthians 13 were considered absolutely essential to the
program’s success. [See the A.A. General Service Conference-approved pamphlet,
The Co-Founders of Alcoholics Anonymous: Biographical Sketches; Their Last Major
Talks (New York, NY: Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., 1972, 1975),
11-14, 18-20.] I was later to learn that most of the material in Dr. Bob’s talk
was incorporated into the DR. BOB and the Good Oldtimers book I had previously
read.
And success there had been for sure. The A.A. basic text, Alcoholics
Anonymous (also known as the Big Book), stated that, of those alcoholics who
really tried, 50% got sober and remained that way; and 25% sobered up after some
relapses. [See Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed. (New York, NY: Alcoholics Anonymous
World Services, Inc., 2001), xx.] It also said of the A.A. members whose stories
were included in the book: “Each individual, in the personal stories, describes
in his own language and from his own point of view the way he established his
relationship with God” (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed., 29). DR. BOB and the Good
Oldtimers pointed out on page 261: “Records in Cleveland show that 93 percent of
those who came to us never had a drink again.” And the early Cleveland A.A.
fellowship used the same principles that had been used successfully in Akron,
together with the Big Book (first published in 1939), the Twelve Steps, and the
“Four Absolutes” of the Oxford Group (absolute honesty, absolute purity,
absolute unselfishness, and absolute love) as moral standards for testing
behavior.
Moreover, the principles and practices of the early Akron A.A.
Christian Fellowship had caused many an objective observer—particularly those
among the supportive Rockefeller people—to observe that early A.A. was “First
Century Christianity” at work. The pioneers in Akron were engaged in daily
practices the Apostles carried on in the Book of Acts. And you just never found
a speaker or a sponsor talking about that.
Wow!
Then came a further
turning point—an event which was to change my life pursuits, my interests, and
my service to the Creator and His son Jesus Christ. I had never heard anything
significant about God, or Jesus Christ, or the Bible in the many A.A. fellowship
meetings I had attended. Yet A.A.’s own General Service Conference-approved
literature contained much to suggest there was more to the picture than most
knew. For example, I had read that early AAs in Akron had called themselves a
Christian fellowship. (See DR. BOB and the Good Oldtimers, 118.) I had read that
they stressed Bible study and old-fashioned prayer meetings. I had read that
Christian literature was distributed to them by Dr. Bob for reading and study.
And I had read that Dr. Bob always insisted that newcomers in the hospital
profess a belief in God and surrender their lives to Christ. [See Dick B., The
Akron Genesis of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2d ed. (Kihei, HI: Paradise Research
Publications, Inc. 1998), 177-78, 181-86, 187, 188-215. And see also DR. BOB,
144, for the specifics of what I later found.]
I still knew very, very little
about what the A.A. pioneers actually did, where they got their ideas, and why
their program produced such a high rate of success.
In almost every meeting I
attended, there was incessant chatter about some “higher power.” One man
insisted his “higher power” was Ralph. Another insisted that “it” was a rock.
Another insisted that “it” was a chair. And still another insisted that “it” was
the Big Dipper. These remarks were made regularly in meetings I attended in
Marin County, California. There was also bizarre talk about “spirituality” that
was foreign to my ears. Where, I thought, did such nonsense come from? To make
matters worse, my own friend and sponsor began telling me that people who read
the Bible got drunk. His sponsor convened a meeting where he and my own sponsor
“warned” me that I was getting ready to drink because I had brought my sponsees
to a Bible fellowship. But there was still more to be experienced and
endured.
I myself have never been the slightest bit concerned about the fact
that many of my A.A. friends are Roman Catholics and Jews and that they talk
about their faith in meetings. But I began picking up at A.A. meetings some A.A.
General Service Conference-approved literature which seemed to endorse, and even
encourage, unbelief—the idea that you didn’t need to believe in anything at all
to get well. The following are but a few of many examples:
“A.A. is not a
religious society, since it requires no definite religious belief as a condition
of membership. . . . Included in its membership are Catholics, Protestants,
Jews, members of other religious bodies, agnostics, and atheists. . . . A.A.
suggests that to achieve and maintain sobriety, alcoholics need to accept and
depend upon another Power recognized as greater than themselves. Some alcoholics
choose to consider the A.A. group itself as the power greater than themselves;
for many others, this power is God—as they individually understand Him; still
others rely upon entirely different concepts of a Higher Power” [44 Questions,
19].
“The majority of A.A. members believe that we have found the solution to
our drinking problem not through individual willpower, but through a power
greater than ourselves. However, everyone defines this power as he or she
wishes. Many people call it God, others think it is the A.A. group, still others
don’t believe in it at all. There is room in A.A. for people of all shades of
belief and nonbelief” [A Newcomer Asks . . .].
“While some members prefer to
call this Power ‘God,’ we were told that this was purely a matter of personal
interpretation; we could conceive of the Power in any terms we thought fit”
[This is AA: An Introduction to the A.A. Recovery Program, 15].
“Many people
in A.A. talk about ‘God’ or a ‘Higher Power,’ but A.A. is not connected with any
religion. A.A. is a spiritual program, not a religious one. Faith is a personal
thing and it is not necessary to believe in God or in any form of religion to be
a member of A.A. . . . Atheists, agnostics, and believers of all religions have
a place in A.A.—provided they wish to stay away from the first drink.” [AA and
the Gay/Lesbian Alcoholic, 16].
The foregoing statements were not consistent
with A.A.’s Big Book text as I read it. A.A.’s Steps said it was about “coming
to believe.” (See Step Two.) The original language of that Step—before it was
changed dramatically in 1939—said: “Came to believe that God could restore us to
sanity.” And the many A.A. statements quoted above were not consistent with Bill
Wilson’s message that the Lord had cured him of his terrible disease (Alcoholics
Anonymous, 4th ed., 191). Neither were they consistent with Dr. Bob’s statement
that he felt sorry for the atheist and the agnostic because “Your Heavenly
Father will never let you down” [Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed., 181]. Nor were
they consistent with Dr. Bob’s insistence that newcomers profess a belief in God
before they were released from Akron City Hospital (DR. BOB and the Good
Oldtimers, 144). Granted, such statements are not today considered mandatory,
any more than opening the parachute is when you jump out of an airplane. But
they represented to me the wisdom of the winners—our founders.
I didn’t have
a problem with the diversity and varieties of believers and unbelievers I met in
the rooms of A.A. But I did have a big problem with the ever-growing talk about
idols (I call them nonsense higher powers)—called light bulbs, door knobs,
chairs, trees, radiators, Big Dippers, and even Santa Claus/
I also had a big
problem with the ever-increasing vocalizing by a few “bleeding deacons” (as some
call them) who said that you could not mention the Bible or God in a meeting;
that the Bible and other religious literature were not “Conference-approved” and
therefore could not be brought to a meeting; or that it was a violation of the
Twelve Traditions of A.A. for a person to share his or her own experience about
how he or she established his or her relationship with God. And the “official,”
“A.A. General Service Conference-approved literature” quoted above, combined
with the vociferous and seemingly-irrepressible outbursts of some at meetings,
seemed to me to be at great variance with the program I entered, the program I
had learned from the Big Book, and the encouragement I had received from A.A.
members and meetings when I needed it most—even when I talked much about looking
to God for help in my life.
I wondered how one could reject God in a program
which spoke so much about God. Stewart C., has shown that the word “God”—when
considered together with synonyms and pronouns referring to Him--can be found
more than 400 times in A.A.’s Big Book. [Stewart C., A Reference Guide to the
Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous (Seattle, WA: Recovery Press, 1986), 115-16)].
So I resolved to go to the Seattle International Convention of Alcoholics
Anonymous in 1990 in order to try to find out what role, if any, the Bible had
really played in the founding, development, program, and successes of Alcoholics
Anonymous. There I met Frank Mauser, the General Service Archivist from New
York. But I was able to discover very little about the role of the Bible in
early A.A. And upon my return, my older son and I had a discussion about
launching a real effort to discover what role, if any, God, Jesus Christ, and
the Bible had played in the tremendous successes of early A.A.
With
encouragement from Frank Mauser, Dr. Bob’s children (Sue Smith Windows and
Robert R. Smith), Ray G. (archivist at Dr. Bob’s Home in Akron), and later Ozzie
and Bonnie L. (the managers of the Wilson House where Bill Wilson was born in
East Dorset, Vermont)—I devoted the next 23 years to learning details about
A.A.’s use of the Bible. I investigated what its early program really did; where
the reliance of members on God really fit in; what proof there was of the early
success rates; and what institutions, principles, practices, and Bible studies
had impacted on early A.A., on the Big Book and Twelve Steps, and ultimately on
the literature of today. I’ll let those who would like to know more about what I
have discovered so far learn the details from my 44 published titles on the
subject. (See http://www.dickb.com/titles.shtml.) But, to say the least,
there is far more to A.A., its roots, its successes, and its early reliance on
the Creator for healing and help than virtually anyone involved in present-day
treatment, therapy, professional groups, 12-Step groups, or religious
fellowships knows.
Today I believe there is “A New Way Out” of the
wilderness. “A New Way Out” for children of the living Creator who are awash and
adrift in the sea of gossip, speculation, opinion, and unbelief that exists in
most of today’s recovery scene. What wilderness? It is a wilderness that A.A.
“cofounder” Rev. Sam Shoemaker called “self-made religion” and “absurd names for
God.” A wilderness of outright idolatrous thinking and amateur psychological
introspection. Let me illustrate “A New Way Out” with my own experiences.
The
alcoholic: The “wilderness” I am speaking about concerns the alcoholic’s own
plight—not the nature or shortcomings of A.A., of N.A., or of other 12-Step or
recovery-oriented fellowships. As I have told above, I had become a full-fledged
drunk and sleeping pill addict by the time of my entry into A.A. Smitten by a
seemingly-uncontrollable intention to drink too much regardless of the
consequences. Driven by a desire to return to the mire again and again, despite
the known and predictable self-destructive disasters. Bill Wilson wrote: “Many
do not comprehend that the alcoholic is a very sick person” [Alcoholics
Anonymous, 4th ed., xiii]. I was!
The Bible called the sickness a sin. It
clearly commanded “And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; . . .”
(Ephesians 5:18a, KJV). But I did just that! Later, in sobriety, I came to see
what I had actually been doing. I drank. I got drunk. I produced disaster. Yet I
returned to that same pattern over and over—always seeing the disasters get
worse. The Book of James—a favorite in early A.A.—defined the progression from
temptation to death. Many have called this “lunacy.” Perhaps the Apostle Peter
best described the behavior when he spoke of the proverb, “The dog is returned
to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the
mire.” (2 Peter 2:21, KJV). But I got tired of hearing in A.A. that I was
“powerless” over alcohol, even over “people, places, and things.” Such doleful
“acceptance” didn’t sit right with what I knew was my own need for
responsibility, control, and accountability. In fact, however, Dr. Bob’s wife
Anne made plain in her journal that a stronger power than mine was needed
achieve victory. (See Dick B., Anne Smith’s Journal, 1933-1939; http://dickb.com/annesm.shtml.) And when--as a child of the
one, true, living God--I utilized that power (the power of Almighty God) and did
what God commanded in the Bible, I neither drank again, nor wanted to.
There
remained, however, a very real and destructive condition and illness still to be
dealt with—brain damage, withdrawal, fear, anxiety, guilt, shame, despair, legal
troubles, imprisonment, hospitalization, confusion, forgetfulness,
sleeplessness, bewilderment. I didn’t want to drink. I just wanted it all to go
away—immediately! I just wanted out. But I found for myself that God provided
the power, the love, the strength, the healing, the forgiveness, the guidance,
and the rescue. I could and did face the multiple problems believing the truths
in biblical promises like these:
I will instruct thee and teach thee in the
way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye. (Psa 32:8, KJV)
I
sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. (Psa 34:4,
KJV)
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. (Psa
46:1, KJV)
In God have I put my trust: I will not be afraid what man can do
unto me. (Psa 56:11, KJV)
In thee, O LORD, do I put my trust: let me never be
put to confusion. (Psa 71:2, KJV)
Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not
all his benefits: Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy
diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with
lovingkindness and tender mercies. (Psa 103:2-4, KJV)
Trust in the LORD with
all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways
acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (Pro 3:5-6, KJV)
The fear of
man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.”
(Pro 29:25, KJV)
To me, these were not simply quaint or catchy sayings. Nor
were they what new A.A. detractors are now calling them—defunct Protestant
fundamentalism. No! They were promises of God. And, true to His promises, God
produced the results when I put the words in my mind and consistently repeated
and believed them. That, I believe, is what the Bible assures us.
There were
more pertinent verses. They were specifically addressed to the born-again
believer, and based on what Jesus Christ had come to do and make available. I
learned, believed, and saw that his work and sacrifice had made me free. I had
to claim that freedom. Some of the Bible verses that helped me include the
following:
For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God: Being
justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.
Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood to
declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the
forbearance of God. (Rom 3:23-25, KJV)
There is therefore no condemnation to
them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the
Spirit. (Rom 8:1, KJV)
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall
tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or
sword? . . . . Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him
that loved us. (Rom 8:35, 37, KJV)
That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth
the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from
the dead, thou shalt be saved. (Rom 10:9, KJV)
And be not conformed to this
world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove
what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect will of God. (Rom 12:2,
KJV)
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are
passed away; behold all things are become new. (2 Cor 5:17, KJV)
And God is
able to make all grace abound toward you: that ye, always having all sufficiency
in all things, may abound to every good work. (2 Cor 9:8, KJV)
Casting down
imaginations and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of
God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. (2
Cor 10:5, KJV)
Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in
Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of Christ in them that are saved, and in
them that perish. (2 Cor 2:14, KJV)
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding
abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh
in us. (Eph 3:20, KJV)
Giving thanks unto the Father, which hath made us meet
to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in light. Who hath delivered us
from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of his dear
Son. (Col 1:3, KJV)
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of
power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (2 Tim 1:7, KJV)
My experience,
then, was that—by reading these and many other verses over and over and over; by
putting them in my mind as frequently as possible and whenever negative claims
were made over me; and by believing them—my release, my deliverance, and the
peace of God came into my life. The accomplishments of God’s own son had
delivered me from the wilderness, not merely of being an alcoholic (sick and
sinful with excess), but from the status of a beaten-down child filled with
guilt, shame, anxiety, despair, fear, bodily maladies, and a sense of
hopelessness. And I know that, as one of God’s kids, I still am and can be
rescued.
When sober and instructed, the choice is mine. And I try to tell
others that--through becoming a child of God, through learning the truth about
Him and His will, and through walking in fellowship with Him and His son Jesus
Christ--they too can be delivered from their drinking problem and from much,
much more as well. That is my testimony.
The message: There is a simple
message that I carry today to those willing to listen and who want my help. It
is this: God wants all men to be saved and to come unto the knowledge of the
truth (1 Tim 2:4). We can be saved—born again of the Spirit of God—by confessing
Jesus as Lord and believing that God raised Jesus from the dead (Rom 10:9; John
3:1-16). When God’s kids then seek Him out by studying His Word and
communicating with Him, they can walk from darkness to light as and when they
walk in fellowship with Him and His son, and keep His word (1 John 1:1-10;
2:1-6).
Still “A New Way Out” today: For centuries, believers have pointed
to the way out and rescue for those who wanted help. These laboring believers
have included workers in the YMCA, in Christian Endeavor Society, in the
Salvation Army, in Gospel Rescue Missions, and in revivals. Even workers in the
Oxford Group with which Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob were briefly associated.
Whatever their particular technique, their message was salvation and a new life
in Christ. There was the additional stipulation that the message be carried to
others. The founder of the YMCA took young men off the streets of London and
into his basement, brought them to Christ, and held Bible studies—rescuing them
from destruction. Evangelists in and out of the YMCA followed suit. Christian
Endeavor Societies formed young people’s groups in the churches themselves and
taught them confession of Christ, Bible study, prayer, Quiet Hour, obedience,
and the principles of love and service. Salvation Army workers dove into the
slums of London and brought the wretched to Christ and into God’s Army to help
others. Gospel Rescue Missions furnished food, shelter, and brotherhood, but
their unswerving objective was to bring men to the altar, a decision for Christ,
and a changed Christian life. So too the old-time revivals and tent meetings.
And so too the Oxford Group people who were focused on changing lives through
surrender to God. This was the way alcoholics were helped in the early days of
A.A. as well.
Once informed of God’s way, suffering souls flocked to the
rescue, confessed belief in God, accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Saviour,
fellowshipped together, and grew through Bible study, prayer meetings, and Quiet
Times. Love and service to others was the only demand made of them.
Today,
when someone in an A.A. meeting tells a person, as they did me, that people get
drunk if they read the Bible, I feel disappointed that they know so little about
the real Way out. When someone tells a person in A.A. or some recovery
fellowship that they can’t mention or study the Bible in A.A., I feel equally
disappointed that hurting souls may soon be deprived of what the early solution
was. When someone says that the Bible and religious literature cannot be read
because they are not “Conference-approved,” I wonder how many newcomers are
being driven away from a relationship with and reliance upon God. When someone
talks of some nonsense god that can be a tree, a radiator, a light bulb, or a
group, I think of the clear-cut descriptive language in Psalm 115 about the
impotence of false gods. And I regret that a newcomer is hearing that he can
pray to a light bulb and get well. I’ve yet to see that happen.
For me, it is
about telling my story, reporting the facts about the role our Creator has
played in the YMCA, in Christian Endeavor, in the Salvation Army, in Gospel
Rescue Missions, in the Oxford Group, and in the early Akron A.A.’s Christian
Fellowship. There are other ways, of course. But the one with unquestioned
success is the Way, Jesus Christ (John 14:6). With increasing fervor, I try to
tell people how God’s liberation, power, and guidance worked in my life, how it
worked in the lives of others, and what an appealing alternative it is to the
way of idolatry, apathy, acceptance, and institutionalized meeting attendance. I
point out that eternal life and the abundant life do not lie in meeting
attendance. See John 3:16 and John 10:10. They spring from a relationship with
God and His son Jesus Christ.
An answer today: I believe there is “A New Way
Out”—a way out of the wretchedness of alcoholism and addiction, out of the
bondage of worldly wisdom and opinion and condemnation, out of the prisons of
the mind that come from depression, fear, physical illness, anxiety, guilt,
shame, anger, and resentment. There is “A New Way Out” for people—not just for
people attending Alcoholics Anonymous and 12-Step fellowships—but for those who
are homeless, imprisoned, physically disabled, mentally impaired, at risk,
cowering in fear and self-loathing, drinking and drugging to excess, and
encountering major barriers and defeat at every turn. Those people should not be
herded into “centers for self-centeredness” where they keep confessing how sick
and hurting they are. “A New Way Out” is not a way out of A.A., or 12 Step
fellowships, or therapy, or meetings, or groups, or churches, or psychiatric
wards. It starts with a decision by an individual to stop his or her
self-destructive behavior(s).
The path starts with a determination to “stay
stopped” permanently, to change, to abstain. It starts with a discipline that
guarantees change for those who go to any length to bring it about. For those in
deep holes, as I was, it may take time. But the way out starts by looking up
from the hole--not out or down. The way out begins by believing that “with God
nothing shall be impossible” when God gives the revelation. (See Luke 1:37.) The
way out begins by recognizing that God wants children and enables people to
become His children by acknowledging what Jesus Christ did to make that new
birth possible. (See 1 Peter 1:23.) The way out—the path to deliverance and
freedom—continues when a child of God sets his or her mind, thoughts, and
outpouring words on what God reveals—not on what the world says. (See 1
Corinthians 2:1-16.) The way out—the path assuring deliverance and freedom—is
followed by walking in the light of God’s Word and the revelation He chooses to
give His family members. The way out is assured by obeying God, talking with
Him, and staying in fellowship with Him, His son Jesus Christ, and other
believers. And that way out is just as available today as it was when Peter
urged, after the miracle at Pentecost:
. . . Repent, and be baptized every
one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall
receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. For the promise is unto you, and to your
children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall
call. (Acts 2:38-39)
This, and the messages from other messengers in the Book
of Acts, changed the lives of millions and millions of those who believed
throughout the following centuries.
I continue to find it a joy and a
privilege to introduce myself to a newcomer, wherever he or she may be.
Then—after gaining his confidence--to ask if that person would like to become a
child of God. I invite the new person simply to confess with his or her mouth
that Jesus is Lord and to believe in his or her heart that God raised Jesus from
the dead. (See Romans 10:9.) And I’m seldom turned down. Then, with them, as it
did with me, the healing and growth can begin. Freedom is certain to follow for
those who walk in fellowship with our Heavenly Father. It did for me. That’s my
story.
dickb@dickb.com, www.dickb.com, www.ChristianRecoveryCoalition.com, 808 874 4876
Gloria
Deo
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